The Mass that followed felt very much affirming. Father H. gave a wonderful homily that was like a defibrillation to my failing faith. I was alar serving and was the first person, other that Father H. himself to receive the Eucharist. Once I receieve Him, I felt a very strong feeling of peace, a feeling of belonging.
I took great comfort in the Gospel reading for this 5th Sunday in Easter.
"Let not your hearts be troubled; believe in God, believe also in me."
"Jesus said to him, "I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father, but by me. "And in John 14:8-12 I felt like I was Philip, who is my confirmation saint, and Jesus was giving me some very good advice:
8 | Philip said to him, "Lord, show us the Father, and we shall be satisfied." |
9 | Jesus said to him, "Have I been with you so long, and yet you do not know me, Philip? He who has seen me has seen the Father; how can you say, `Show us the Father'? |
10 | Do you not believe that I am in the Father and the Father in me? The words that I say to you I do not speak on my own authority; but the Father who dwells in me does his works. |
11 | Believe me that I am in the Father and the Father in me; or else believe me for the sake of the works themselves. |
12 | "Truly, truly, I say to you, he who believes in me will also do the works that I do; and greater works than these will he do, because I go to the Father. |
I had been seeking to see God, and He was there all along, I just hadn't realized it. Jesus had given me a little bit of constructive criticism. It was truly a memorable day.